I had dumb parents...thankfully

Grandchildren are the crowning glory of the aged; parents are the pride of their children.  Proverbs 17:6 (NLT)

Only a fool despises a parent’s discipline; whoever learns from correction is wise. Proverbs 15:5 (NLT)

I thought my parents were trying to ruin my life by not letting me do whatever I wanted until I realized it was that they cared about me and were trying to protect me from evil and destructive things.

I thought my parents were treating me like a slave in the summer when we would have to wake up early and go out and walk rows of beans cutting weeds until I figured out that we all benefited from the harvest of that field and it was just as much my job as my dad's to do it.

I thought my parents were so mean when they set a curfew and expected me to abide by it until I realized that maybe it was because they wanted me home safe by a certain time and not out running around at all hours of the night so they didn't have to stay up worrying.

I thought my parents were trying to punish me when I couldn't have all of the cool, name-brand stuff until I realized it is just expensive stuff that costs a lot of money and doesn't really make you who you are.

I thought my parents were completely unreasonable when I had to get a job and earn my own money until I realized that taught me a lot about responsibility.

I thought my parents were being a little too tough on me when I had to pay for my own college and living expenses until I realized that they really didn't have the money to do it for me and remembered that they did pay my cell phone bill, my health insurance and loaned me their car to use and paid for the insurance on it...and I took it pretty serious (most of the time) since it was my moola.

I thought my parents were being nosey when they wanted to know where I was at all times and who I was with until my daughter started asking to go places with her friends.

I thought my parents were just plain ignorant about everything involving a teenager until I realized that they were teenagers once and knew way more than I thought.

I thought my parents were totally irrational when they expected me to get up and go to church every stinking Sunday and other church-related functions until I realized that the lessons I learned at church, church camp, bible school, and other church activities are the things in life that really matter.

My brother, sister-in-law and I were talking the other night at youth group.  My brother said that he had heard somewhere that if you want to see how well you raised your children, look at your grandchildren.  I laughed and told them that was great, we can now blame the Quackers for how our kids act!  But really when I think about it, that makes sense.  Why?  Because it took me 15-20 years and having two kids of my own to realize that my parents weren't so ignorant.  They were trying their best to raise us with good morals, a real work ethic, responsibility, etc.  They only wanted what was best for us.  I can only assume that my parents were as baffled at parenting as I am right now.  And honestly, we had a very good life.  I really can't complain about my childhood.  I was happy.  I had two loving parents and a brother that wasn't too bad either.  It was an easy walk in the park compared to many, many other stories you hear about.

Prayer for our parenting is what I cling to.  So much of it is out of our hands.  We can't just close our eyes, cross our fingers and hope that our kids turn out okay.  Praying, leading by example, disciplining when necessary, giving grace when appropriate and loving is what we are left with.  We have to do our best and trust that God will help us along our journey.  I can only hope that in 20 years my kids will be thankful that Jay and I were dumb parents...