Hi, my name is Sarah and I'm an addict...

As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his foolishness.  (Proverbs 26:11 NLT)

Yes, it's true, I have addictions.  Let me just summarize a few that seem to really have a hold on me currently.  #1  Diet Pepsi...not just any Diet Pepsi either.  I need a 32 oz. Styrofoam cup with lots of ice and very sweet fountain Diet Pepsi.  I can tell you just about anywhere (I travel on a regular basis) where you can get the best D.P., and if they do not have the right cup (Casey's-just sayin'), then it does not warrant a purchase.  Seriously.  Sometimes if I'm desperate, I can use a smaller Styrofoam coffee cup there, but it's just not the same...and it's only about half the normal size.  Bummer.  I can tell if the CO2 is not right and/or if they have adjusted how much syrup is released.  I have learned these things.  If the gas station owner is super greedy and doesn't care about my business, he will be chinsy on the syrup and I will not return.  Thankfully, our local gas station understands my addiction and feeds it...to their benefit, I may add.

#2   Sweets, in general.  My daughter was baking cupcakes when I started.  Lord, help me, please.  She is my enabler.  I know I created her to be a little Betty Crocker because I used to make "junk" constantly...until I hit about 30 and then the junk went in the trunk, if you know what I mean.  I like a good 'ole box cake mix...even just a plain one, without icing...We (oh, yeah, Jay too at times, I'm not in this alone) will eat an entire cake in one evening, one small slice at a time.  It's pitiful.  Oatmeal cookies...hello, it's fiber, right?  Most of the time when we make oatmeal cookie batter, it doesn't even make it to the oven.  No joke...we stick it in the fridge and eat it out of the bowl.  Literally, there will be three spoons sticking out of it...What an example, huh?

#3   Scrapbooking supplies.  Note I didn't say scrapbooking, I said scrapbooking supplies... That's right, I collect supplies.  I have the cutest scrapbooking totes and materials, scissors, stickers, stamps, pages, markers, pens, glass cutter, paper cutter (two sizes)...I could go on and on.  And I have oh, about 4000 pictures sitting in piles and/or boxes...Catch that?  I didn't say they were in scrapbooks...they're waiting to be put in the scrapbooks with all the cute supplies and materials I collect.  It is really sick.  Madolyn has picked up the scrapbooking bug and completed her first scrapbook for 4H so maybe, just maybe I can collect the materials and she will put them to use.  Man, I hope so.  It's going to get the best of me!!

I know these few that I have mentioned seem harmless, I know in the big picture, they're not necessarily going to kill me or hurt someone else.  I realize I may not be arrested and thrown in jail because of them or lose my kids.  But because of the work I do, and because of a lot of the people and situations that I come in contact with, I think a lot about addiction and how hard it is to overcome them.  You know we've all thought it, Why can't they see what this is doing to them?  Don't they see they are losing everything, including their children?  Why can't they just stop?  Don't they think more of themselves than that?  How hard can it be?  What is it going to take?  How far do they have to go?

My point being is this...I, myself, have my own little addictions.  They may be harmless now, but what if they progressed?  What if they did take over my life?  Do I want to go without my Diet Pepsi every morning?  No...and why should I?  It's not hurting anything, right?  What if my collection of scrapbook supplies got to the point of hoarding or got in the way of buying my kids' clothes or school supplies?  What if my eating habits got so bad I was unable to function as the parent of young children or put my health in jeopardy?  In fact, whenever I try to quit something and I feel like it's just too hard, I think of other addicts who battle drug or alcohol addiction and think, no wonder, they have such a hard time, I can't even give up caffeine or chocolate or TV or whatever it may be, geesh, who am I kidding?

I have come to learn that before judging an addiction of someone else, I have to look at my own.  Even harmless addictions can become a problem if we let them take over our lives.  At times I am no better than a drug addict.  My morning can take a nose dive if the gas station is out of D.P., no joke. In a nutshell, I think moderation is the key.  It's when we go overboard and become dependent on things that is the problem.  Really our dependence should come from the one and only God.  But as long as I can get Madolyn to quit baking junk and instead finish my scrapbooking projects, I should be okay, that would take care of at least two of my problems, but I am so not ready to let go of that 32 oz Styrofoam fountain Diet Pepsi just yet...