But at the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.
Mark 10:6-9 (NIV)
Divorce...I see it day in, day out. It's way too easy. And it really shouldn't be. They keep changing laws that make it even easier too. It's now to the point where you don't even have to be separated a certain period of time, there are very few grounds for divorce...whereas in the past you had to pick something like irreconcilable differences or adultery. Back several years ago, you had to be separated two years to get a divorce on irreconcilable differences, which means it was no one's fault, your marriage was just 'irretrievably broken down' and 'future attempts at reconciliation' were likely to fail. Then they created this six-month waiver you both could sign to get past the two years...because good heavens, what if I want to get remarried right away?!
At one time, having counsel was a must. Now, we have several pro se parties...which means they are doing it all on their own, thanks to the Internet websites that provide the forms and information. You can even file a waiver of fees and get the filing fees waived too...so you can really bypass a lot of the excess and get that quickie divorce.
This is what pushed me over the edge today - I just scheduled a divorce for an over-the-road truck driver, whose present live-in has been the one calling me for court dates. When I gave her the date, she responds by telling me that he will have to take the whole day off and how he doesn't want to waste too much time waiting his turn in court.
Oh, heaven forbid, you waste time on ending your marriage. What an inconvenience.
Makes me crazy.
And weddings. I can hook you up with a civil ceremony one Monday a month for a mere $10. Now, if you can get married for approximately $37 (license is $27 I think) and you can have your fees waived for divorce - what a deal!
I'm not against all courthouse weddings because I do think that every now and then we get serious couples in who just want to be married and don't need all the hoopla. That's fine with me. It is a waste of money to spend thousands on a wedding anyway, in my opinion, at least. But probably 75% of the weddings we see, we will again see in divorce court...or someone else will.
Or, hey, why bother with divorce? Just move in with someone else today! There is certainly no time to wait.
Marriage is serious. It's a contract entered into by two people (man and woman in my book) saying - No matter what I'm sticking this thing out with you. Even if I'm a jerk sometimes, or you're a jerk. Even if I like marina sauce and you like nacho cheese sauce (haha, I had to throw that one in for Jay). Even if things are not perfect.
I do realize stuff happens. Marriages do break down and some for very good reason. Some without fault by one party. But many times, you just have to push through the rough spots.
We live in a world that demands instant gratification and feel-good moments. There is absolutely no time to wait on anything. And for some reason our government has lost all sense when it comes to the laws regarding divorce. It should really not be such a petty procedure. I guarantee if they had some sort of app on the iPhone to get divorced, it would be a gold mine.
I may not have a perfect marriage, but I do have a serious belief in the commitment I made. Maybe I got lucky when I married my guy, (I'd like to think so) but whatever the case may be, it isn't always easy. And it shouldn't be.
Sometimes I have to accept the nacho cheese and do without the marinara. ;)
Showing posts with label soapbox. Show all posts
Showing posts with label soapbox. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 15, 2016
Monday, July 6, 2015
I change my mind...a lot
I'm not going to sugarcoat this - I do not care for tattoos. Period. I do not like them, Sam I am. Plain and simple. I'm not mad at people for getting them, but honestly, I always cringe when I see a young person who has just taken the plunge and gotten one. And here is why...
I change my mind...a lot.
Thinking back to my teen years, I was obsessed with a couple different things. First and foremost, the Beatles. I loved the Fab Four dearly. My room reflected it. I had Beatles memorabilia all over my bedroom. To this day, I still have my Beatles Beach towel. (I have finally let it be used for its intended purpose, [gulp] and it now has a hole in it.) I had an alarm clock, pictures, books, etc. I loved the Beatles and I loved the Peace sign.
Before the Beatles craze hit me, I loved the comic strip The Far Side. Loved it. I had one of those daily calendars and every single day, I would rip off a new comic and tape it to my wall. One year = 365 comics. (Man, my parents must have loved me.) I also had all kinds of Gary Larson books.
And somewhere in the middle of the Beatles and the Far Side infatuation, I fell in love with Trolls. You know what I'm talking about? The little plastic naked men with bright neon hair that stuck out every which way. They came in all different sizes and outfits. I had gobs of them. Trolls were everywhere.
Stretching even farther back before the Beatles, the Far Side and the Trolls obsessions, I loved teddy bears. There were 101 teddy bears stenciled all over my walls, in country blue...with rose curtains. I had a couple shelves full of my collection of teddy bears. I treasured my bears.
So when I was at my prime tattoo age, I can imagine that if I had decided to get a tattoo, I might have gotten a peace sign and/or some sort of reference to the Beatles. "All you need is love" or "Let it be" come to mind. I can't imagine that I would've gotten Ringo Star's face tattooed onto my arm, but you never know. I really loved the Fab Four.
I still like Beatles music. If I came across the Far Side comic strip, I am positive, I would crack up laughing and immediately recall why I loved them so much. Trolls make me laugh...just because I was so obsessed with them and they're so freaky. (I'm thanking the Lord right now I do not have a troll tattooed on my body.) Teddy Bears...are cute and cuddly and it's not that I don't like them anymore, but I'm not sure I would feel too mature with a giant teddy bear on the calf of my leg.
A Christian comedian I went to see made this comment about tattoos. His analogy cracked me up (in my words)...That bass (fish) you had tattooed on your belly will someday transform into a great white whale.
Seriously, yes. Our bodies change.
Our likes and interests change.
The most poignant factor in my decision never to get a tattoo was Jay's Grandpa Truman...he begged both of us to never get a tattoo and showed us why. It wasn't quite the bass-to-whale transformation but it left an impression, let me tell you.
And to be frank, I'm not a fan of pain or needles.
I know there are all sorts of Christians that have crosses and scripture and other signs of their faith tattooed all over their bodies. I'm not sure if that is used as justification or what. To me, it doesn't matter. I may offend people for this, but there are lots of people who wear crosses in some or fashion and do not believe in Jesus Christ. You having a cross or fish tattoo doesn't necessarily convince me you're a believer. Just like wearing a Christian t-shirt doesn't necessarily confirm my Christianity.
My dislike of tattoos doesn't have anything to do with whether you're a good person or a crazed lunatic. I'm not mad at you if you have a tattoo or twenty. I'm just curious about what young people will think in 10 or 15 years about their choice of body art.
My point is this: I would be mortified - and probably spending lots of money right now to remove it - if I had a tattoo of Ringo Star on my arm.
Before getting that tat, go back ten, fifteen or twenty years and think about something you just loved and now don't really give much thought. (It might even be a person!) Now imagine a picture of that 'thing' permanently on your body...
I change my mind...a lot.
Thinking back to my teen years, I was obsessed with a couple different things. First and foremost, the Beatles. I loved the Fab Four dearly. My room reflected it. I had Beatles memorabilia all over my bedroom. To this day, I still have my Beatles Beach towel. (I have finally let it be used for its intended purpose, [gulp] and it now has a hole in it.) I had an alarm clock, pictures, books, etc. I loved the Beatles and I loved the Peace sign.
Before the Beatles craze hit me, I loved the comic strip The Far Side. Loved it. I had one of those daily calendars and every single day, I would rip off a new comic and tape it to my wall. One year = 365 comics. (Man, my parents must have loved me.) I also had all kinds of Gary Larson books.
And somewhere in the middle of the Beatles and the Far Side infatuation, I fell in love with Trolls. You know what I'm talking about? The little plastic naked men with bright neon hair that stuck out every which way. They came in all different sizes and outfits. I had gobs of them. Trolls were everywhere.
Stretching even farther back before the Beatles, the Far Side and the Trolls obsessions, I loved teddy bears. There were 101 teddy bears stenciled all over my walls, in country blue...with rose curtains. I had a couple shelves full of my collection of teddy bears. I treasured my bears.
So when I was at my prime tattoo age, I can imagine that if I had decided to get a tattoo, I might have gotten a peace sign and/or some sort of reference to the Beatles. "All you need is love" or "Let it be" come to mind. I can't imagine that I would've gotten Ringo Star's face tattooed onto my arm, but you never know. I really loved the Fab Four.
I still like Beatles music. If I came across the Far Side comic strip, I am positive, I would crack up laughing and immediately recall why I loved them so much. Trolls make me laugh...just because I was so obsessed with them and they're so freaky. (I'm thanking the Lord right now I do not have a troll tattooed on my body.) Teddy Bears...are cute and cuddly and it's not that I don't like them anymore, but I'm not sure I would feel too mature with a giant teddy bear on the calf of my leg.
A Christian comedian I went to see made this comment about tattoos. His analogy cracked me up (in my words)...That bass (fish) you had tattooed on your belly will someday transform into a great white whale.
Seriously, yes. Our bodies change.
Our likes and interests change.
The most poignant factor in my decision never to get a tattoo was Jay's Grandpa Truman...he begged both of us to never get a tattoo and showed us why. It wasn't quite the bass-to-whale transformation but it left an impression, let me tell you.
And to be frank, I'm not a fan of pain or needles.
I know there are all sorts of Christians that have crosses and scripture and other signs of their faith tattooed all over their bodies. I'm not sure if that is used as justification or what. To me, it doesn't matter. I may offend people for this, but there are lots of people who wear crosses in some or fashion and do not believe in Jesus Christ. You having a cross or fish tattoo doesn't necessarily convince me you're a believer. Just like wearing a Christian t-shirt doesn't necessarily confirm my Christianity.
My dislike of tattoos doesn't have anything to do with whether you're a good person or a crazed lunatic. I'm not mad at you if you have a tattoo or twenty. I'm just curious about what young people will think in 10 or 15 years about their choice of body art.
My point is this: I would be mortified - and probably spending lots of money right now to remove it - if I had a tattoo of Ringo Star on my arm.
Before getting that tat, go back ten, fifteen or twenty years and think about something you just loved and now don't really give much thought. (It might even be a person!) Now imagine a picture of that 'thing' permanently on your body...
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
Driver Distractions
This subject matter has been on my mind a lot lately because of a new law - driving distractions. I have decided that many things cause distractions, it's just that some are more noticeable than others. Personally, I'm annoyed by the new law regarding cell phone use while driving. What is next?
For instance, my daughter is always wanting to drive, and I am always telling her that even though she may believe she is a good driver (little too soon to tell), how would she be in an emergency situation? For instance, she hates spiders. They completely freak her out. What if a spider were to drop down in her lap, what would she do if she were behind the wheel of a car? Hmm. This has happened to me a couple times, and although I am not super scared of spiders, I certainly don't like them and usually have some sort of knee-jerk reaction to having appear one in my lap.
Will spiders in cars be outlawed soon?
If you're like many folks these days, you may feel like you're on the go constantly. I know we eat way too much on-the-go, but sometimes it is the only option if we're out and about. Have you eaten a taco while driving? I have many, many times. Syd's tacos are the worst to eat in the car because they're so greasy (but oh, so good). I cannot tell you how many times I have dropped the back end of a taco in my lap. Should I eat a delicious, greasy Syd's taco while driving down the road? No, probably not, but I must admit I do.
Will eating in cars be against the law next?
Who hasn't been driving down the road with their infant or toddler in the back seat strapped in...and they drop their pacifier, bottle, toy, etc? I will say I have reached back into the backseat many times to grab something off the floorboard or hand my kids something, only to look back up and realize I have veered off the road. It is not a good idea, no argument there.
Will they outlaw children in cars while their mothers are driving?
There are so many scenarios that I could come up with that distract me while I'm driving. Just this morning, driving to work in wintry conditions, I was plugging along following the car in front of me, not having a bit of trouble...and I started daydreaming and went off the road a little bit...and I do mean just a little bit, just enough that my car made that funny sound. I even laughed to myself because I wasn't texting, talking on the phone, reaching down to grab my fallen phone, picking my nose, getting chap stick out of my purse, putting on make-up or eating a taco. I simply zoned out.
Will they make daydreaming while driving illegal in the near future?
I recently traded vehicles and now have this touch screen in my dash to control everything. I'm somewhat comfortable with that screen and how to navigate around it now, but at the beginning, just trying to turn on my defrost could have caused me to crash. There are some factory-set safety features that keep me from getting too carried away on that touch-screen, but seriously, as much as I love being able to check the weather map or search for the best fuel prices as I'm tooling down the road, it is very distracting.
How is talking on a cell phone more dangerous than that?
I get not texting while driving. I'm not saying I have never been guilty of this, but I understand the distraction it causes entirely. Do I think teenagers are capable of texting and driving down the road at the same time? No, and adults aren't either. It is dangerous. No question. End of story. I'm not advocating for texting and driving to be legal.
Lawmakers have decided that at sixteen years old, you are capable and responsible enough to have a driver's license. Are we preparing our kids for that responsibility or are we going to rely on traffic laws to handle it?
I'm not suggesting driving laws are not necessary. What I am suggesting is that at some point you have to use common sense and take responsibility for your actions. Dangerous actions often lead to serious and even deadly results. And there are not enough laws in the land to cover every scenario that might cause an accident. We must teach kids common sense and responsibility...and better yet, use it ourselves.
Okay, I'll step off my soap box now...
For instance, my daughter is always wanting to drive, and I am always telling her that even though she may believe she is a good driver (little too soon to tell), how would she be in an emergency situation? For instance, she hates spiders. They completely freak her out. What if a spider were to drop down in her lap, what would she do if she were behind the wheel of a car? Hmm. This has happened to me a couple times, and although I am not super scared of spiders, I certainly don't like them and usually have some sort of knee-jerk reaction to having appear one in my lap.
Will spiders in cars be outlawed soon?
If you're like many folks these days, you may feel like you're on the go constantly. I know we eat way too much on-the-go, but sometimes it is the only option if we're out and about. Have you eaten a taco while driving? I have many, many times. Syd's tacos are the worst to eat in the car because they're so greasy (but oh, so good). I cannot tell you how many times I have dropped the back end of a taco in my lap. Should I eat a delicious, greasy Syd's taco while driving down the road? No, probably not, but I must admit I do.
Will eating in cars be against the law next?
Who hasn't been driving down the road with their infant or toddler in the back seat strapped in...and they drop their pacifier, bottle, toy, etc? I will say I have reached back into the backseat many times to grab something off the floorboard or hand my kids something, only to look back up and realize I have veered off the road. It is not a good idea, no argument there.
Will they outlaw children in cars while their mothers are driving?
There are so many scenarios that I could come up with that distract me while I'm driving. Just this morning, driving to work in wintry conditions, I was plugging along following the car in front of me, not having a bit of trouble...and I started daydreaming and went off the road a little bit...and I do mean just a little bit, just enough that my car made that funny sound. I even laughed to myself because I wasn't texting, talking on the phone, reaching down to grab my fallen phone, picking my nose, getting chap stick out of my purse, putting on make-up or eating a taco. I simply zoned out.
Will they make daydreaming while driving illegal in the near future?
I recently traded vehicles and now have this touch screen in my dash to control everything. I'm somewhat comfortable with that screen and how to navigate around it now, but at the beginning, just trying to turn on my defrost could have caused me to crash. There are some factory-set safety features that keep me from getting too carried away on that touch-screen, but seriously, as much as I love being able to check the weather map or search for the best fuel prices as I'm tooling down the road, it is very distracting.
How is talking on a cell phone more dangerous than that?
I get not texting while driving. I'm not saying I have never been guilty of this, but I understand the distraction it causes entirely. Do I think teenagers are capable of texting and driving down the road at the same time? No, and adults aren't either. It is dangerous. No question. End of story. I'm not advocating for texting and driving to be legal.
Lawmakers have decided that at sixteen years old, you are capable and responsible enough to have a driver's license. Are we preparing our kids for that responsibility or are we going to rely on traffic laws to handle it?
I'm not suggesting driving laws are not necessary. What I am suggesting is that at some point you have to use common sense and take responsibility for your actions. Dangerous actions often lead to serious and even deadly results. And there are not enough laws in the land to cover every scenario that might cause an accident. We must teach kids common sense and responsibility...and better yet, use it ourselves.
Okay, I'll step off my soap box now...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)